Ed, Edd n' Eddy Z Episode 3: Humanoids

Ed, Edd, n' Eddy Z: Episode Three: Android Assault

Last time, on Ed, Edd, n Eddy Z…

Eddy and Edd were attempting to open the burlap sack Kevin and Rolf were tied up in, but the android Ed had blasted the Kamehameha at rose from the rubble. Ed, being the strongest, had no choice but to fight the android. The battle ended with Ed as the victor, leaving the android as a pile of scraps. Unbeknownst to the Eds, another regiment of android infantry was on their way to the Cul-De-Sac…

(The Eds' location.)

(Edd is searching the crater of ash and rubble for the technologically advanced mechanism, while Ed and Eddy are attempting to get the sack open.)

Edd: (muttering) Oooohhhh… Ed, I wish you could have used your "Megawatt Hammer" farther away from the base..

Eddy: HRRRGGGGHHHH!Kevin: HEY! Watch the hat, dork!

Rolf: This act of flacker-mackerel is starting to pain Rolf!

Ed: Hey, Rolf! Can I have a chicken when we get you out of Rulog's prison?

Rolf: Yes, Brow-of-One Ed-Boy, if Rolf does not summon the Meat Lords upon you!

Eddy: JESUS F-KING CHRIST! BOTH OF Y'ALL, SHUT UP!

Kevin: OH YEAH! What are you gonna do about it, you midget!

Eddy: HOW ABOUT I KICK YOUR F-KING ASS, F-KFACE!

Edd: Eddy! Watch what you're saying! Good lord! Your language is so vulgar!

Eddy: Shut it, Sockhead! Squarehead and Stretch here won't shut their traps!

Kevin: F-K YOU, CHUMP!

Rolf: Rolf will be sure to offer you, Hair-of-Three Ed-Boy, a disgraceful-!

Eddy: SHUT THE F-K UP!

Rolf:…

Edd: Good Lord, Eddy! How many times do I have to tell you! WATCH YOUR MOUTH!

Eddy: LIKE I CARE WHAT YOU TELL ME! YOU'RE NOT MY MOM!

Edd: (sigh) Speaking of your mother, I wonder how she can put up with such awful behavior!

Eddy: Shut up!

Ed: Both of you are acting like children! Let us settle this like men!

Edd: For once, Ed, I think so as well.

Ed: We shall settle this by a fight to the death!

Edd: Err…Never mind…

(There is a large rumble.)

Eddy: WTF!

Edd: …. What was that?

Rolf: The Meat Lords have been summoned upon you!

Ed: Perhaps it is more of Rulog's minions! Or perhaps it is the great Tibrerio!

Edd: Ed, please! That's enough of your nonsense!

(400 meters from the Eds' location, an argument is taking place.)

(The conflict is between both Androids and Humanoids.)

Android Lieutenant G-6: You nimrods! You nearly gave away our location!

Android Front Coordinator T-12: Relax, G-6. I understand that the rumble created from the weapon reached the enemy base, but we're too far from them for them to confirm anything.

Android Lieutenant G-6: You idiots! Have you forgotten that we're dealing with Saiyans?

Humanoid Sergeant Ion: Saiyans aren't that powerful compared to us, Lieutenant.

Android Lieutenant G-6: Have you forgotten how easily *B-5 was eliminated? He was an Archon!

(B-5 was the Android who had been destroyed by Ed. Also, an Archon is an android whose abilities and skills far surpass those of an Android Colonel. Here are the Power Levels: Archons = 6800G's-13000G's

Colonels = 4000G's-10000G's

Ed = 7000G's-10400G's

Edd = 4000G's-8000G's

Eddy = 5000G's-8200G's)

Humanoid Major Colonel Gamm: Feh. As if we cared. You robots are just fodder compared to us… superior beings.

(2 Android infantry units cast glaring looks at the Humanoids.)

Android Front General O-7: SILENCE! All of you!

(Both the Humanoids and the Androids stand up straight, completely caught by surprise.)

Android Front General O-7: We only allied ourselves with you humanoids because both of our Masters have agreed to a treaty. Just one snap from you and this alliance will be terminated! Am I clear!

All: YES, GENERAL!

Android Front General O-7: Good! Now that we have that issue out of the way, we can discuss battle strategies.

(Back at the Eds' base.)

(Eddy and Ed continue to try to get the sack open, while Edd resumes his search for the weapon.)

Edd: It should be around here…

Eddy: Crap! What's this rope made of?

Ed: HRRRRGGGGHHHH!

Edd: Ah-hah! Found it!

(Edd pushes the ash and rubble off the mechanism.)

Edd: Ed, if you could?

Eddy: Are you serious, Double-Dee? Me and Bristle Hair here have enough trouble trying to open this frickin' sack!

Edd: You can't be serious!

Eddy: Does it look like I'm joking here! We can't even cut the rope!

Edd: Can't even cut the-? Here, let me look at that.

(Edd examines the rope tied around the opening of the sack.)

Edd: Hmmmm…

Eddy: Find anything out?

Edd: Yes, I did, Eddy. This…rope…is actually a piece of robot technology!

Eddy & Ed: What!

Edd: Judging by its texture, it must be made of something much harder than diamond.

Eddy: What the hell? Is that even possible?

Edd: Yes, if it's made by androids…Did I hear you say the H-word?

Eddy: ARRRGGH! Will you quit acting like my mom!

Edd: I can't help it! I can't stand such vulgar language!

Eddy: Who gives a crap!

Edd: Well, apparently…I-

Eddy: You what?

Edd: Hold that thought, Eddy…

Eddy: Huh? Why?

Edd: …They're here…

Eddy: What? Who's here?

(Eddy notices the urgent alarm on Edd's face.)

Eddy: Wait, you don't mean…

Ed: It is Rulog's minions!

(Six Humanoids fall from the sky to confront the Eds.)

Humanoid 1: Hmmm… Our masters said that there'd four of them, but I only see three. He probably miscalculated.

Humanoid 2: One of them probably ran like a chicken when B-5 confronted them.

(At the mention of the word "chicken", Ed starts jumping up and down.)

Ed: CHICKENS!

(Ed starts running around and around until he runs into Humanoid 1.)

Ed: I LOVE CHICKENS!

(The impact of Ed's "accidental" strike sends the Humanoid flying into one of the houses.)

BOOM! CRASH! BAM! WHAM! THONK!

(The Humanoid crashes through 6 houses.)

Humanoid 1: Gluuuuuuuuuuhhhhhh…..

(The other Humanoids just gape at the wreckage and their comrade.)

Ed: Where are the cute little chickens!

Eddy: Uhhhhhh….

Edd: …..

Humanoid 2: You little-! GET HIM!

(The Humanoids converge together to gang up on Ed.)

Eddy & Edd: ED!

Ed: Hah! You can't hold the mighty Ed down! I'll-Gmmmph!

Humanoid 2-6: Shut it, inferior being! Have a taste of my foot! Take this! Just die!

(Eddy and Edd get angrier and angrier as they watch Ed get pummeled by the Humanoids.)

Eddy: Grrr…That's it! I ain't standing around while Monobrow gets the lumps kicked out of him!

Edd: I feel the same way, Eddy!

Eddy: Let's get 'em!

(Eddy and Edd disappear. The humanoids are still taking it out on Ed.)

Ed: Grrrmph! Oof! Glaagh!

(Eddy reappears behind one humanoid and uses his elbow to strike the humanoid down.)

Humanoid 5: Aaaggh!

(Eddy then turns to knock out a second humanoid with a side kick.)

Humanoid 4: Goooomph!

Humanoid 2: Why you-!

(The other Humanoids focus their attack on Eddy. Edd reappears behind them and whacks them in the back of the head with a *crescent kick.)

*A crescent kick is actually a half-moon kick. The range is in front of the user, like a half circle.

Humanoids 's 2, 3, and 6: Waaagggh!

Eddy: Nice one, Double Dee!

Edd: Thank you, Eddy.

(Eddy and Edd help Ed get up.)

Ed: Ha ha! They didn't stand a chance! Rulog can send as many of his minions as he wants! I'll just blow them away with Grinthar's Megawatt Hammer!

Humanoid 2: Heh heh… We aren't through yet…

(The Eds turn around to see all the Humanoids getting up.)

Eddy: Oh, f-k..

Humanoid 2: Plus, you have more of our company to deal with… Look above you.

(The Eds look up to find 7 Androids floating in the air.)

Eddy: I think I'm gonna shit myself…

Humanoid 2: Meh heh heh… Too bad that there's only three of you and thirteen of us…

(Suddenly, a voice rings out from nowhere.)

Unknown Voice: No! There's four of us!

(A figure appears from out of the blue.)

Unknown: It seems a little unfair, don't you think? There are more of you than us.

Humanoid 1: Hey! Wait a minute! You're a Saiyan!

Unknown: Yes. That is true. I am a Saiyan. I am the Saiyan called Michael.

Humanoid 2: Michael! So you're the famous Saiyan who's been going around killing us off!

Michael: Yes, but I'm not the only Saiyan.

Humanoid 1: Yes, I'm quite aware of your affiliation with those bastards *Corey, Drew, and Zach.

*There is a YouTuber named SSJ5G whom I've been talking with and he said for me to surprise if I made my own Ed, Edd, n Eddy Z series. SSJ5G, if you are reading this and have a problem with it, then I'll re-edit this story.

*Michael: Oh, doing your research, have you? Well, I have more friends than that…

Chase! Bowen!

*I'm Michael.(mikevuong14, Michael. See?)I'm also Asian.

(Two more figures appear from the sky.)

*Chase: Heh, it's been a while since I've fought Humanoids.

*Chase is one of my best friends. He also likes Ed, Edd, n' Eddy. He's American.

*Bowen: Really, Chase? I've been fighting Humanoids since this war started.

*Bowen is another one of my best friends. He's very smart and usually gets A's and B's (mostly A's) in Honors classes. He's Asian.

Michael: Now really isn't the time, you two! If you want to fight Androids or Humanoids, then be my guests.

Humanoid 1: Heh, you arrogant fools…

Michael: Bring it, suckers…

(The Androids and Humanoids try to converge on the three Saiyans, but they remain calm.)

Edd: What are you doing! You'll be killed! You don't know what they're capable-

(Michael spreads both his legs out, puts his arms on the sides, and prepares himself.)

Humanoid 2: DIE!

(Michael's body instantly begins emitting a blue aura.)

Michael: Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa…..

(Suddenly, all of the Androids and Humanoids howl in pain and go soaring backwards.)

Eddy: WTF!

Edd: Hunh!

Ed: Cool!

(The enemies land on the ground, all of them writhing in pain.)

Michael: You and your masters very severely underestimate us. But, just make sure you get it through your heads that we can kill you..

(The three Saiyans disappear. Then they reappear over the battlefield.)

Michael: We're going to show what we can do.

(The Saiyans take on a stance and put their hands in an odd form.)

Michael: KAAAA…

Bowen: MEEEEEE….

Chase: HAAAAA….

(Halfway through the chant, a sphere of blue light begins to materialize in their cupped hands. Ed recognizes the move.)

Ed: HEY! That's the Megawatt Hammer!

Michael: MEEEEE….

Michael, Chase, and Bowen: HAAAAAAAAAAAA!

(Blue light erupts from their hands, and the energy materializes into a beam.)

Eddy: WHOAAA!Edd: AAAAAHHH!

Ed: GRAVYYYYY!

(The force of the blast blows the Eds away and destroys a few select houses. The blast jets straight at the androids.)

Androids: !

(In seconds, the androids are obliterated. The blast bounces off the ground after destroying its target and shoots out into the sky. The Saiyans then float back to the ground.)

Michael: Now do you see?

(The Humanoids are terrified.)

Michael: Good… Now get the hell out of here before we kill you!

Humanoid 1: No! We are superior to you!

Humanoid 4: Kram! Don't be a fool! We have to retreat! We'll come back for them!

Kram: No! I've already called in reinforcements!

Humanoid 4: What? How many men did you call in?

Kram: Twenty-four, at the most!

Humanoid 4: You idiot! You'll be killed no matter how many reinforcements we have!

Kram: I don't care! I'm not having my honor stained by these Saiyans!

(From the sky, 24 Humanoids float down.)

Kram: We're all staying and fighting!

Michael: Meh.

Chase: Dude, they have us outnumbered!

Bowen: You think this is a game!

Michael: Have you already forgotten that the Eds are Saiyans, too!

The Eds: HUH!

Michael: I'll explain after we're through owning these noobs.

Edd: I..I guess we don't have a choice…

Eddy: Fine by me! I've been wantin' to get my hands on those bastards, anyway!

Ed: BUTTERED TOAST!

(The Saiyans and the Eds engage the Humanoids in battle, each one taking five Humanoids at a time.)

Michael: Dadadadadadadadada!

Bowen: Ha!Ho!Hee!

Chase: Oof! Yah! Argh! Hah!

Ed: CHUNKY PUFFS!

Edd: Haff! Glagh!

Eddy: Ooooff! Mindless little-!

(The Humanoids launch a team combo on Ed and Ed is sent soaring towards one of the houses. Little did anyone know that Ed was flying towards Kevin's base!)

CRAASH!

Ed: Ha ha… I see stars…

Nazz: Owww…

Ed: Huh! Nazz!

Nazz: Ed? Is that you? What's going on?

Ed: We are fighting Rulog's robot minions!

(Johnny and Plank burst out of the rubble.)

Johnny: Robots! You were right, Plank!

(Jimmy's voice rings out from nearby.)

Jimmy: Guys! Sarah's been hurt!

(At the mention of his sister getting hurt, Ed flies over to Jimmy's location.)

Ed: Where is she! Where is Baby Sister!

Jimmy: Ed! She's-!

(Jimmy didn't have to say anything, Ed already saw the sight. Sarah was covered in bruises and blood.)

Ed: SARAH!

Sarah: Ed….

Ed: Oh no…

Sarah: What are you…

Ed: Don't talk, Sarah… I'll beat up those bullies for you… I promise…

(Back outside..)

Eddy: Ah, shit! Ed's out of action!

Edd: Darn those Humanoids!

Michael: I wouldn't say that yet, you guys. Look…

(Eddy & Edd look closely through the smoke, and see Ed.)

Eddy & Edd: ED!

Ed: ….

Chase: He looks pissed for some reason…

(Eddy and Edd notice that Ed is carrying someone in his arms.)

Edd: Is that… Sarah?

Eddy: What! Sarah?

Edd: Oh no! She's been hurt!

Ed: Guys…

Edd: Yes, Ed?

Ed: Can you do me a favor?

Eddy: Uhh, sure…

Edd: Anything, Ed.

Ed: Please protect Baby Sister and the other kids…

Edd: … Sure…

Eddy: Got it…

Ed: Thanks, you guys…

(Ed gently gives Sarah to Edd.)

Ed: Now I'm off.

(Ed flies to join the fray.)

Michael: Is…Sarah okay?

Ed: She is a little bruised like a strawberry but she'll be fine.

Michael: I see. Bowen, Chase. Perhaps it would be better if you just stepped back.

Chase: What? Why?

Bowen: I don't see how you're going to beat them without our help.

Michael: Just trust me. Ed and I will handle this.

Ed: I, Ed, will be sure to send them all into oblivion.

Michael: All right, you little shits! Bring it!

Humanoid 2: You? Just the two of you? AHA HAHAHAHA! How amusing!

Michael: Hmph… Fine, laugh all you want. You ready, Ed?

Ed: I am as ready as the Gunkmen were when they faced the Ribbs clan.

(Both Michael's and Ed's bodies begin emitting auras. Michael's aura was blue, Ed's was white.)

Kram: Meh heh heh… This'll be fun…

Michael: Oh really?

(In a blink, Michael is right in front of Kram.)

Kram: Wha-?

(Michael kicks his opponent, sending Kram spiraling towards the other Humanoids. The Humanoids are struck like a bowling ball and pins.)

Michael: Not done yet! Ed!

(Ed moves with super sonic speed towards his enemy in a flash.)

Ed: Eat this!

(Ed throws a barrage of Ki blasts at the Humanoids. Each blast finds its target.)

Michael: *DODON STORM!

*Dodon Storm is a move I derived from the Dodon Ray(or in Japanese, Dodon-Pa.)

The user rains down hundreds(or, if strong enough, thousands) of Dodon Rays on the enemy.

(The Dodon Rays are falling down on the enemy. The Humanoids cry in agony.)

Ed: MEGAWATT HAMMER!

(Ed fires off his "Megawatt Hammer"(Kamehameha) at the enemy.)

Michael: KAMEHAMEHA!

(The beams collide, causing a massive explosion. The Humanoids fall to the ground, but some of them get back up.)

Kram: (Cough) Damn… you…(Gasp)

Humanoid 2: D-Dammit! My body-!

Kram: Yunis!

Humanoid 5/Yunis: Yes, sir!

(A glowing light materializes from Yunis' hand. As the glowing sphere is in his hand, he holds up his hand and the light explodes. It does not, however, contain destructive properties.)

Kram: Ahhhhh… That feels…feels… soooo good!

Michael: Huh!

Kram: Surprised? Yes, we have a healer. All it takes is a little of his energy to heal us all.

Michael: Tch!

Ed: No way!

Kram: You may have taken out 14 of us, but we still outnumber you!

Michael: Rrrr… Ed… you take eight of them, I'll take the other eight.

Ed: ….

Kram: Heh heh heh… You still wish to fight? Fine, so be it! Get them!

Ed: Michael, stand back. I'll take them all on.

Michael: … I understand. Do as you wish.

Ed: All right, you mutant scum. I'll fight you all! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

(Ed's body begins emitting a red aura.)

Michael: Ahhhh…Interesting, he hasn't even meditated, yet he's showing sparks of the Kaio-ken. Guess I don't really need to teach him that, he'll do fine with meditation. The other two are a little weaker, but they should master the Kaio-ken with time, given that they know the Kamehameha, Special Beam Cannon, and Masenko(Demon Flash).

Ed: I WILL DEFEAT YOU ALL!

The stranger's identity has been revealed! His name is Michael, and he is one of the Saiyan warriors fighting the Androids and the Humanoids! The technique he had been planning to teach the Eds was the Kaio-ken. But it appears that Ed is already on his way to mastering it! With the fierce rage roaring inside him, he is ready to unleash his true power! How strong will Ed be? Will Sarah not tell Ed's mom? Can he defeat all sixteen of the Humanoids? Find out on the next episode of Ed, Edd, n' Eddy Z!